Saturday, November 19, 2005

The end of a hectic week full of neverending pasta and the passing of Mr. S

Well, this was a hectic week and we should have guessed it being how it started.

Sunday: I decided that since we had finally gotten Jamil's car fixed the day before at the dealer, we would take separate cars to church. That way Jamil (who had stayed up all night preparing the Bible study) wouldn't have to get ready in such a short time. Instead he could hang around the house a bit longer and then go get Mrs. Louise. Well, his nicely tuned up car blew a tire... not punctured or anything just plain blown on the side. After much debating and in the middle of me trying to figure out how to get juice and pastries without money or a wallet for the hungry Sunday schoolers to come, Jamil decided he needed me to come over and help him. So I did. And that is how I left for church at 8am and didn't get there until 11:10AM. Makes that story of the little ladies in Florida's 24 hour church trip not sound so unbelievable.

Monday: One of my co-workers was leaving at the end of the week which left me with the daunting task of trying to get a brain dump out of his head. That and a customer installation that couldn't be completed took up most of my day. At the end of the day we went to see the S's for a little bit. Time with the S's is always nice, educational and refreshing. It reminds me ever so much of my time as a kid with my grandma.

Tuesday: Mr. S got taken into hospice as an inpatient, and that is how the day started. Pretty confusing all around. And at work, besides trying to get a brain dump from my coworker, I had to move a customer's system that was being tested and then I had to work on a presentation for a meeting next week. At night we were able to see the S's and spend some time with Mrs. S who was still getting used to the new in-hospice environment. Mr. S slept the whole time we were there, much different from the man we left on Monday. At least he was not in pain.

Wednesday: Jamil's uncle from Canada was in town and so we invited him and Jamil's grandma and his other uncle and aunt (the ones that live in Lawrenceville) for dinner. We cooked neverending pasta. Since the couple's group was coming in the next day we went ahead and made two trays. Well, Jamil's family almost finished the pasta, but of course they didn't because it is never ending after all. Then the thought dawned on us: out of 3 times we had cooked this, 2 it hadn't ended and out of those 2, one was followed by a death (someone who hadn't eaten pasta). It is a good thing we are not superstitious. We were able to see the S's briefly and drop Mrs. S a banana. Mr. S didn't look any better, but again at least he was out of pain.

As icing on the cake, I had a doctor's appointment with a doctor I dislike very much. It was scheduled for 11:30AM and I was not helped until 12:45PM. I just needed a prescription. I said this on the phone when I scheduled my appointment. On my first visit to this doctor, after making me write 15 pages worth of information on my first visit (visit was scheduled for a simple consultation), made me urinate in a cup, took some blood and asked me to lie down without ever talking to me about the reason I went to see him. When I asked if he even knew why I was there he was very startled. This time this is how it went an hour and 15 minutes after my scheduled appointment:

Nurse: Hi Patricia can you please give me a urine sample
Patricia: Can I? Yes I can because after an hour sitting here I have had plenty of time to partially refill my bladder, but do you want to know why I am here?
Nurse: (Thinking no) Why are you here Patricia?
Patricia: For a prescription
Nurse: Ah
Patricia: (Thinking... these people need to learn to read, maybe that way people wouldn't sit in this office so long). I can still urinate in a cup for you if you would like.
Nurse: No that is ok, come sit here

I sat in the lab section, and after asking how much longer it would be, she directed me to a sit far from he in front of the doctor's office. The meeting with a doctor was exactly 4 minutes, and he didn't even really talk to me.

Thursday: Work was once again hectic. I left about 1 hour later than I had planned due to this passing of the baton. We rushed through bad rush traffic to meet the Bible study group. We arrived 10 minutes after the first couple and found out that it takes a lot longer to warm up neverending pasta than it would have taken me to make it fresh. Bible study was good. 1 Samuel 27. We prayed for the S's. There was (as usual) pasta left over. Mrs. Louise joined us ( we would like more people to join our group since we recently converted it from the couple's group to the everyone who wants to come group. We would particularly like more of the older members of our church to join us, they are all such a great influence and model in our lives. I stayed up until 3am knitting my Harry Potter scarf (to be worn at the movie viewing on Friday), but didn't finish so I wore a half done scarf instead of a completed one.

Friday: Since Mr. S had gotten bad last week, we had made sure to have our cell phones in the room every night. Thursday night Jamil's cell phone stayed out. A 6am voicemail message from the eldest S son told us that Mr. S had passed away at 1am the night before. It is the end of an era. We returned the call (we got the message right as we were leaving late for work). We decided to join our group to watch Harry Potter after all. We stopped by before meeting out group to see Mrs. S.

Saturday: Mr. S viewing. No matter how many of these things you go to, they don't get any better. Mr. S had gotten a little mischivieous in his last few weeks (or at least we had gotten to know his joker side just a few weeks ago) so you almost expect him to sit up in his coffin and laugh at everyone. But he didn't, and that is how after 9 years of ups and downs and many of what seemed like near death encounters, Mr. S is know with the Lord. He has left a great legacy in us though. And by us, I mean Jamil and I but I also mean all the people that ever knew him, because it is impossible to have know the S's and not learn anything. Mrs. S is a very gifted and strong woman and we are sure she will make it through this and our group is all very committed to ensuring this happens.

We will see what God has in store for Sunday... Maybe we'll take one car this time and avoid the temptation to cook pasta... Fortunately, God is in control of all things and so we do not have to worry about superstitions.


Chandra said...

I kept expecting him to sit up and tell us all to quit crying, too! But when I kissed him goodbye, his cheek was so cold. It wasn't soft and warm and a little thin like I had remembered. And that's when I had to start to realize that he's gone.

But you're right... they have left us with a legacy that we have the privilege and duty to carry on. May we be able to love future generations as they have loved on us.

Patricia said...

Very true.

Last time he was really sick we were sitting with Mrs. S (maybe Jamil wasn't there now that I think about it). The phone rang and Mrs. S stepped out of the room to answer it. I was just sitting there and he was sleeping (seemingly). Then he woke up and in a little tiny weak voice said: don't be sad. All I could do was smile and tell him that I wasn't sad (I had been, before he spoke, but not when I responded), I told him he will be going to his reward and that we would be alright. I also told him we'd still be coming to see Mrs. S. He nodded and fell back asleep.