Ok, this is an honest to goodness re-telling of this morning's events.
I walk into the bathroom half asleep and Jamil is trimming his beard (he grew one the week he was sick and has ignored my jabs to shave it off). He was wearing a shirt the same color as mine and I asked him to go change it. He said he got dressed first so I should change mine. I told him I couldn't cause he hadn't done my Puerto Rico laundry. So here is what ensured.
Me: It makes you look pale, so change it.
Jamil: I am not pale.
Me: Yes you are, in fact in the years since we have been married, you have grown almost white. Actually, we are going out in the sun again, to reclaim the Florida/PR color.
Jamil: No I'm not.
Me: Yes, you are. You are way pale. I am married to the most American Indian in the world, don't want to be married to the whitest too!
Jamil: Maybe it is because you are really a vampire and suck my blood when I am not watching so I am growing pale. (said with a straight face, no laughter, no nothing).
Me: Oh, really? I'm surprised you wouldn't have noticed.
Jamil (matter of factly, still very serious): What? Can you think of a better explanation?
I had to leave for work, but if he is wearing a yellow polo shirt today and you see him, please pinch him for me?