What do you mean no cable?

I am currently in Puerto Rico. After 7 years and 3 degrees at Tech, I will be working in July and so I came home before I start.
Puerto Rico is a beautiul island. The beaches here are absolutely awesome, the food is excellent, it is warm all year round (it means only one set of clothes: summer) and the culture is very relaxed. However, when you have grown up here it feels more like it is too hot always, traffic sucks (worse traffic than Atlanta traffic) and the best beaches are crowded which makes one less than relaxed.

In any case, my family lives closer to the mountains (30 minutes away fromt he beach), it is not so hot, there is always a breeze and we don't have to stumble into rush hour traffic very much at all so really I don't have it that bad so I can come, spend time with my family and relax. However, I am faced with a very big challenge when it comes to enjoying myself: my parents have unsubscribed from 90% of the cable (satellite really) channels that matter.

Whoever has heard of paying for cable if you don't even get NBC and ABC? Who cares if you get QVC, HSN and ESPN if there is not a single movie channel. I can watch TV from all around the spanish speaking world, but I can't see old one hit wonder singers jinx current one hit wonder singers on Thursday night! This is outrageous, were they not informed that we didn't subscribe to any movie channels in Atlanta because we were counting on catching up on all the movies we hadn't seen during our vacations in Puerto Rico? How can we have quality family time if our nice big TV only plays cartoons? Not to mention local Puerto Rico TV is a moral, health and intelligence hazard.

I am afraid of what I will be surprised with when we come visit for Christmas. Now, to google to figure out what people did for entertainment before there was cable.